wordless-soul

For the best people in my life!!

2011-05-05T05:55:00.000-07:00

It was a strange feeling when I stepped into Route 2M today and saw all faces gleaming at me with a smile. They are my friends, with them I have shared a very different bond. We have so much age gap, but that never deterred exchanging any thought. With them I could be what I cannot be in a professional world.

Among them, some will be married in a few years time, some would take up further studies, some married gals would have pot bellys soon and some are planning their honeymoon. Our lives are different, priorities are different but in bus we all cohabitate as best friends.

As I move on today, I have a mixed feeling of happiness and grief, happiness for a new life and a better future but along with it I am moving away from those who have been the world to me.

I will miss the times we spend in bus, I will miss the jokes, the games and the fun. Here are some verses of laughter & Pun J

Whose leg will I pull from tomorrow,
Whose heart will I pierce with verbal bow and arrow

Whom will I tease for a weird nail polish shade,
With whom will I fight for a card of spade

Whom will I call cheapo and stale,
With whom will I exchange chains of mail

For whom will I carry books to exchange,
Who will compliment me when my looks will change

With whom will I work out and fight,
Whom will I guide what is wrong and right

With whom will I match a step in dance,
With whom will I gossip office & romance

From whom will I snatch a chocolate piece,
With whom will I share my happiness & grief

Memories are endless and dear to keep
Our friendship is a bond which is quite deep

Whenever you miss me, just send me a beep

..beep beep !!

Friends……. just Keep smiling as it costs nothing.

Mission impossible!!

2011-02-12T15:52:00.001-08:00

She pointed towards a peak right in front of me and I looked up in utter disbelief that I will be able to make it. Last 15 days in gym balanced with birthday parties (sub’s, calzones) has not given me results which I could count on.

My heart missed a beat, because I knew it would be tough and painful, but I had to do it. The helicopter ride which I had partially counted on was strategically negated by my group as they had planned the climb at night. 13 km, 4 hrs seemed like a major target set for my yearly appraisal, when my boss had decided to fire me soon.

When I looked around, there were member’s who were regular visitors and were planning to take it bare foot, some were planning to run up while I was thinking will I be able to sustain. It was a tug of war between slim and fat, young and old and belief and disbelief.

7.30 PM Feb 5th 2011, is when we started off for the climb in the midst of loud enchants of Jai Mata Di on a road covered with shops hanging souvenirs, head bands and sticks for support. Following the spirit I picked up a headband giving me the look and strength of a pakka bhagat.

My dissatisfying first stop was at first 50 steps on the climb, when I was gasping for breath and my heart was pounding so hard as if it will come out right now. I looked at members of my group who were enviously treading fast on the slope, and I started calculating the hours it will take if I go with this pace. “Jai Mata Di”, said my friend with smile and gave me a sip of water. He told me, this is how it is but it is not impossible.

With further slower steps and strange realization that I have to make it through we started walking forward. After a few quarter to half kilometers(couldnt count kilometers), we joined back with my group who were dancing on the beats of Dhol. Amazed by their enthusiasm and encouraged by the beats I joined in Bhangra steps.

Enchanting Jai Mata Di with a strong belief in almighty together with infectious vivaciousness of my group, their encouragement at various steps when I was tired and my friend’s constant support eventually helped me climb the rest of the 9 kms(in 5 hours, not a bad target achievement in IT). As we climbed further heights, the winds and the view brought with it a freshness of an early morning stroll. Refreshing cold water bath took away all the tiredness and we were soon standing in the queue for the eternal Darshan of Mata Vaisho Devi.

People have a strong belief, that her view is possible only if she sends you an invitation and yes I was standing there in front for her, with hands folded in bow. It was she who had called me here, it was she who wished I should meet her which made me reach here.

It was 4.30 AM in the morning and the next major step was Bhairon Baba temple, which was another 1.5 kms with a steep climb. I had given up hope as I was aware that I had to walk back 13 kms, but the spiritualist girl among us forced me to complete this important and mandatory Darshan. I couldn’t possibly walk back if I climbed it, so planned to board a horse(pittu).

It was the most horrendous experience(where I felt the importance of a seat belt), with a Langoor making an anti climax entry, making the pittu take a U turn to my horror. Adding to the romance of the trip was a continuous down pour of rain along with strong wind sweeping us of our feet. The improved weather did help us walk down quickly but baby steps to avoid slipping and leading to severe calf pains.

Last 2 kms felt like a never ending lap in the race to home, which was made worse by a gentle man’s suggestion to take the stairs in the last lap. 163 plus, 60 plus and misguided 531 steps later my walk was reduced from a human to a penguin stroll.

Just then my friend pointed towards the same peak which I had doubted yesterday and I couldn’t stop myself from a smile in jubilation, “WE MADE IT POSSIBLE”.

My sincere thanks to my great friends and Route 2M family members who planned, encouraged and supported me in making this mission possible. Jai Mata Di!!

Family No. 1!!

2011-01-26T10:24:00.000-08:00

It’s said, Friends are better than family, as we can chose them.

Route 2M, a cryptic name for some has emerged as a god given family to us. Each one of us has found a relation which has been our support when we were dull, has given us strength when we were tired and given us hope when we were lost in disillusions of corporate world.

Every member in this family has a beautiful role to play in our life which makes it a whole. From Lata mangeshkars of the world to Sachin Tendulkars, from great gamblers to “Ghar ki Bahus”, all cheer up for each other, for five days morning & evening for 1.30 hours.

The length of journey, which is unbearable for non family members who rarely get to sleep, is enviously very short for our family, as we have never felt the pain of non adjustable seats of the royal brand.

A true representation of multi cultural India, with a conglomeration of Punjab, UP, Himachal, Bihar, but the common religion which ties us together is a single word, enjoyment. Every day is sparked by the brilliantly imagined game plans, whether it is drawing the road side signals on a touch screen, to dumb charades, cut the cake, UNO, antakshari and recent additions like volley ball, clap at 3 and dictionary.

Extending this spirit are numerous parties for birthdays, Roka, engagements where members celebrate their happiness. Saviors for these treats range from temptations, grilled sandwiches, patties but the venue is always the same, our not so hygienic but a very warm spirited bus, where we are not charged on a per plate basis. It is an open house, where we can snatch from each others hand but it is ensured the driver always gets a share for bearing the loud voices and longs waits on the stops when some members are late.

Work pressure, boss problems, personal issues are never discussed within the group but are every day replaced by jokes, leg pulling, a melodious song and special dance parties on numerous occasions. It makes us feel the comfort of home, before reaching our own families. Bahu’s feel free to dance, sing and enjoy forgetting silence & shyness they have to maintain at home and married men for once just forget that they are tied to commitments. Our spirit has encouraged some shy members to dance on an unimaginable dance floor and reacting to the video coverage as if he/she would soon be on television.

A family which is hard to part with, a family which is always there for us and a family where we can be what we are, is our family No. 1..the Route 2M family!!

Dedicated to all the members of my family who have shared with me a great bond, the Route 2M bond!!

My Best Friend's Wedding!!

2010-12-07T14:19:00.000-08:00

For one of my very best friend, as we share a special bond which is hard to define.

Hands half covered with Mehendi, face radiant with pre bridal gold facial and a huge smile. From Boy cut to shoulder cut, from jeans to sari and from tom boy to shy bride such is a change love brings to a woman as she progresses in her life. She has been one of the most intellectual gals I have ever known. We always used to talk about further studies, career and a bright future and strangely guys were never a part of any of our conversations. She has been a friend, a philosopher, a guide, has made me smile when I was dull and wished me success at every mile.

It was an exciting occasion for me to attend for two reasons, one to meet her after 2 years and second to see her sport a saree. Am sure she would have practiced wearing it around 20 times. When I landed in Mumbai, I was greeted by a happy Punjabi family full of fun and enjoyment. The evening was all set for “Geet Shangna de” and I had done my homework by revising some Punjabi marriage occasion songs. Mehfil was already in full mood when I joined the group singing songs. “Madhorama pencha vey”, “Charkha channan da”, “Main chali piya pekdey” were some of the number I could encourage everyone to sing along a with a song where I made a boy dance with a chunari based on theme, where bride tells her mom that she doesn’t want to go to her husbands house.

2 performances were a hit in the function, one by me where I put up a sale for each member of the family for “Dhai Aaane” and another was from her bua ji who had created a medly of old songs and matched them up with couples in their family. It had combination of songs where the elderly couples like Nana ji and Naniji actually performed a disco number. I was amazed to see how well a preparation was done for such a special occasion for her and this must be the kind of love she spreads in her family.

Night ended with a lot of chit chat with her relative aunties who told me stories of how they felt when they got married and catching a glimpse of the magnificent view of Mumbai, where sea was right in front of me, blushing with reflection of light.

I woke up at 5 AM as was hardly able to sleep and so was bride to be wide awake concerned about color of her Mehendi and all convincing her it would be right for the occasion. Everyone was hurried as the mahuarat for the havan was fixed for 7 AM when she was to wear chura which is worn for 40 days in Punjabi marriages. Being appointed as a “Sarabali”(bride mate) I was on my toes and had to be next to her at all times. We quickly got ready to reach the venue as it was in Mulund around 1.5 hours from bandra and soon hit the road cutting our way across the Bollywood city of India. Poster of upcoming movies, Amitabh, Shahrukh, aishwarya entertained us on the journey to a Marathi wedding.

The boy’s family greeted us with great affection and with a lot of rituals which I have seen for the first time. Clad in Marathi silk saree, my friend looked a beautiful doll while she walked towards the mandap. Her parents looked so happy when the couple exchanged rings and continued to perform the rituals, but her mum had a little tear in her eye. In the festivities and emotions my mind just circled back to the watch and it was already time for my flight. I wished the couple a happy married life and her family goodbye.

9th November 2010, will always be a special day in my life and every year when I wish her a happy anniversary, the memories of this occasion will make me smile!!

Break Ke Baad!!

2010-12-04T17:40:00.000-08:00

I still remember the days around 20 years back, when weekend was marked as a festive time as VCR from Kalra Movie gallery along with four movies was to arrive in the evening. Movies were played one after another, songs forwarded and eyes glued to the TV sets whole night to watch the latest movies. Mum still used to frown as she was sent to kitchen to make some snacks & tea and she would keep an eye on the kettle while catching glimpse of the scene standing in the corridor.

From 4 PM to 10 PM BST, the same sequence was repeated as I watched three films in a row and the last one being break ke baad. From those times to this time, it actually was a Break ke baad for me.

After watching that movie, I couldn’t resist writing this blog as that movie was yet another movie which hit a cord with me after Dil chahta hai. A story written by Prasoon Joshi, a famous advertiser and story teller has brought forward the concept of a aggressive passionate girl who has dreams to become a movie star. She is an outgoing courageous woman who can leave behind everything to pursue her dream. People who loved her tried to come in her way in the sake of relationships as boyfriend, as mother but soon realized that her passion is everything for her.

It clearly showed when a person is following a passion, he/she can be blinded to other view points for those around them. Like her mother was an actress herself and she had gone through a lot of pain which she didn’t want her daughter to face, so wanted to protect her and even tried to be angry. She was right in her own sense and that emotion of hers made the gal realized that a passion is as good a goal as is her loved once support.

It had a similar impact on her boyfriend, who actually was her friend and was so used to her that he first tried to push himself on her. But with a break from her, he started following his own dream and made a mark in what he was good at with a support of some strangers, who became his friends. He soon realized what passion means to the person who is following it and he becomes more of a support than being annoyed.

Movie also highlighted role of friends in our lives and how friends love us for what we are but not for what should be. They can be away for a while, but they are always there for us when we need them.

Kudo’s to the independent, confident and fun loving girl’s character that Deepika has played in the movie. It also addresses a positive change which has come within women in India, who now dream and wish to fulfil them. Also, they can now propose to men with their knees bent rather than waiting for the man to take the first step.

I often wonder the creative thought which goes into finalizing these characters(Lillet Dubey, Naveen Nischol, Sharmila who had marvelous contributions to their role), their role, the outdoors, visualizing and actually making these movies. We as audience just pass our review comments on a Rs. 150 ticket which we sometimes feel have gone waste on a movie, but reality is many of such movies actually give us a new direction/a new thought on life.

Great work on “Break ke Baad” and my next blog after a long break. Enjoy the movie!!

Purani Jeans...!!

2010-10-21T05:50:00.000-07:00

“Your name” has been tagged on a photo, was the message I received a few months back. I clicked on the link and it was a group photograph which was clicked around 16 years back, in the year 1994. It was a photograph of Class 12, Section C. I was amazed to see myself in the photo and my memories went back to the day this photograph was clicked, last day in school before our board exams.

The notification was from my class mate in school and comments on the photograph showed profile pictures of my classmates. Some had receded hair line, some were holding their babies, some had put on weight and a few looked just the same. A few more photographs were added within next few days and messages were all reflecting memories of those days. One of them had written, he first time drove a car on our farewell day and another one related to how slim he was then.

16 years seemed as it was just yesterday, when I was in school and our class teacher was taking attendance. I still remember our class had 9 Amit’s who were differentiated only by their surnames, one of those faces was a proud sports captain, another one was a classical dancer, yet another was a very good singer and all of them now are well settled professionals. I was happy to see 2 Amit’s out of those 9 were still in touch and met often.

When we had left school, we had put our signatures on each other’s shirts and taken vows of never forgetting each other and being in touch. But as life progressed, those names and faces got registered into memory and we soon fell apart. As we walked further in life, we made new friends, relationships and life went on. But those times still remained in memory and those instances became stories which we narrated to new friends and ties we made.

Am appreciative of community platforms like facebook, which has brought some of them back to me, and am happy to look at their pictures, their kids, read their progress in career. But some where I still miss some faces whose names are on my school shirt and my autograph book, but I have not met them since.

I often wonder, how will it feel when I will bump into them on road some day, will they talk to me or even recognize me.

I spent a day today, reflecting on those good times which I shared with them, the funny & stupid things we used to do and longing for a day, when those closed chapters of life will unfold and I will meet them again.

Common Wealth Games …A New Religion@Delhi !!

2010-10-19T02:46:00.000-07:00

Gasping for Breathe, face flushed with sweat and heart beat racing high, she bent towards the floor, to get back some strength then looked at the trek she has just finished running…in the midst of loud cheers she picked up India’s flag and waved at the audience.

Such was the view at CWG where Indian athletes made India proud. From Shuttlers to wrestlers, boxers to shooters, High jumpers to athletes every participating player has pushed themselves to the next level to make India end 2nd. Many won gold medal for India for the first time, many records were broken, new games learnt and new friendships made.

Delhi became the center of attention for the world with shadows of Media outrage, stories of corruption, cleanliness, snakes and monkey’s emerging in games village which were all dumped by a spectacular Opening ceremony, an extensive showcase of Incredible India. A night which showcased the immense talent in India raging from Shyam Bengal(the sutradhra), AR Rehman(CWG Anthem), Hariharan(Swagatam), impressive dancers with cross culture dance styles, drummers, sand artists and Yoga practitioners. World would always remember, the bangle shops, kullarh wali chai, the dabba wala, mithai wala with big jalebi’s and long forgotten sugarcane juice extractors.

Delhi prepared well to host our special guests with its world class Games village, widened & cleaned up roads and parks, rejuvenated CP, CWG lane with Rs 2000 fine, special coach for women in metro, hop in hop off buses, hoardings of Shera and last but not the least, world class stadiums which were all light up as if they were decorated for Diwali. Special folk dance performances, mushayar, crafts bazaar and trips to one of the 7 wonders of the world Taj Mahal.

Delhites poured at the stadiums in huge numbers to support the games, volunteers spent endless days working in shifts to support the efforts of athletes and guests. Doordarshan which had become mostly extinct by hoards of news and entertainment channels, once again emerged as the channel with highest TRP as every eye was glued to the games. We appreciated the High Definition transmission, professional commentary and relay of the award ceremonies. Special advertisement on railways (Rail Gaadi), games we used to play(ankh micholi, pithu, kabbadi), tourism ads on Gujarat, kerala etc which struck a chord with many became a big hit.

Many of us visited some of the games, painted our faces with flags especially for India vs Pakistan Hockey match and waved Indian flag at the games. Hooted slogans for Indian players, prayed on the last day for 2 Gold medals for India to finish 2nd. 38 gold and great performance of some our women athletes who have made a new mark in these games.

All played, worked and contributed together for a common purpose, Common Wealth games where SPORTS became the only religion of Delhi.

For those 11 days, every Delhite felt proud of participating in some way in the gala CWG event and all related to a beautiful song written by Palash Sen for Delhi….

Mera Ghar, Mera Pata, Meri Shaan…..Delhi hai Meri Jaan..!!

Next Generation Mobile Love!!

2010-09-17T02:48:00.001-07:00

Dedicated to all my friends in love and me on call waiting.

Technology has redefined many aspects of our life – From hand-washing to Washing machines, Dish washing to dishwashers, cooked to micro-waved food and a little device in our hand called Mobile from Pigeon mails & love letters.

I reflect back to a hit movie of our times (don’t think am very old), which had shown a white pigeon as a symbol of love where it did a free job of exchanging messages. It was also recognized as an indicator to the heroin that her hero is thinking about her. So was the irony of love a few years ago. We still had phone then, but the calling rates were quite high, so most of the people stuck to letters. I still remember the trend of pen friends, where two unknown people became friends by sending letters, which eventually made some meet the love of their life.

I often gather around my aunts to hear their stories of marriage and back to when they got engaged. Love was a forbidden word in their times and most of them had arranged marriages. (which actually has now become a forbidden word to many). One aunt told me, after their engagement uncle gave a call at her office and her boss called her to attend the phone. Yes they just had a phone next to her boss’s seat. (Love to imagine you attending a phone in your Reporting manager’s cabin ). Her face got pale with panic and her hands trembled while saying the first hello. Her boss was thoroughly concerned and doubting that everything was fine and even checked with a colleague who told her she is engaged and then Boss had a sigh of relief!!. Such was the beauty of love and relationships in those times, where people longed to talk, wrote letters to express their feelings and waited for ages to meet.

Zooming back from those days to these, pen friends have been replaced with cryptic key board friends who use the QWERTY/NON QWERTY key boards to quickly type the lovey dovey messages or forward messages. Postal departments around the world have moved away their business model from selling stamps and handling letters to Saving Schemes. And bosses don’t dare to peak into a phone which is received even while in a meeting.

Love of your life is always online through SMS, emails and messengers in phone. Love birds have ample time to discuss what they have eaten, what they are wearing and what they felt when a colleague mocked at her hair today. While 24x7 news channels still stick to the top stories, our love birds discuss the minutest details of every minute which they have spent without them. Mobile has become as precious a commodity as food to survive. I have seen people who don’t panic if their wallets are snatched but are more concerned if their phone is left at home.

For many the definition of love goes wrong if he/she didn’t pick up the call when he/she was busy with work. For some, love is more about a status check on their partners to make sure he/she is not with some one else. Facebook/orkut profiles of partners are actively monitored for new messages/scraps and status updates.

Love earlier was a thing to preserve which now seems to become a necessity to maintain a comparative mobile bill between friends and compare “Mera BF tere BF se smart kaise”. People earlier used to discover each other when they started living together, unfolding the secrets of other persons nature one at a time, always amazed with his/her reaction on a romantic journey together, his/her reaction when either got hurt etc. But today, even in arranged marriages, I see people talking from the minute they get engaged to the marriage day. Expectations are already set about each other and they know so much about each other already, that nothing much is there to explore further(especially for long dating couples).

I often wonder, has this constant communication lead to a increasing rate of divorces in the world, the number of breakups in early relationships, the number of heart breaks, suicides and of course emergence of new mobile service providers.

Is love more about calling many times a day to check what we are doing/feeling or is love still a feeling which makes you smile when you think of that someone special!!

Abodana Dhudhtey Hain!!

2010-09-11T10:31:00.000-07:00

Driving down on NH24, a four lane highway connecting Delhi to Ghaziabad now, I could only view hoardings on either side of road displaying advertisements of upcoming construction of homes in Ghaziabad and Noida area.

An area which was prohibited to stay for quite some years, has become quite a hot property today. Tall sky scrapers coming closer reminded me of the downtown view of Chicago(minus the cows and CNG autos), which I admired on my first visit to US. I was amazed to drive on the smooth highway and thinking how easy it is to commute to such far flung place now.

Every building, every home seemed to be occupied with smiling faces peeping from the balconies enjoying the beautiful weather. A dream bubble emerged in my head, with a scenario where am decorating my room with my most adored collection of art, arranging my cupboard and my favorite ghazal playing in background "Tere aane ki jab khabar mehke, teri khushbu se sara ghar mehke".

Woosh..just missed hitting an auto..Remember I was driving.

A home registered in my name, with my savings has been a yearning dream in my heart since I saw my parent's smiles when they bought our home around 20 years back. A home, for which I keep noting ideas of decoration, of furniture arrangements, latest wall paint options, those little things which I will buy, even the jingle of door bell and yes a name plate inscribed "Supi's World" on it.

After stabilizing in my career a few years ago(with some sufficient funds), I started my search for my dream home. From Rohini, Sarita vihar, Indrapuram, Faridabad and now Noida my search has been endless. I had very interesting experiences for each locality which I sometimes look back and smile at.

Sarita Vihar: I was led by my uncle, into a meeting with a property dealer, who gave an amazed look, when he was told that "I" was the one who was looking for a house. He couldn't believe it to be true and even said kids grow up very early now a days :-). (Some praise, I was very young then!!)

Rohini: I went to meet a property dealer on a rickshaw not realizing that he felt am a broke and if I cannot afford a car, how I will be able to buy a home.

Indrapuram: From apartments at 14th floor to builder floors, the options have been endless. Buildings in construction reflected upon me the famous song "Do diwane shere mein, raat mein or dopahar mein.." where the hero/heroin walk around buildings under development. Relatively, I also had a friend then with me, whom I had pushed to look for a house. Paid around 10 visits, selected a house and finally the deal didn’t materialize just for a lac of rupees. But positive side, was my friend bought a house which his parents really wanted him to buy. I visited them today, I could see signs of joy & relief on his parent’s faces and yes the name plate on the door “in his name”.

Faridabad: An under construction area(rather than buildings) marked a major challenge there, where my first visit changed the color of my car from Azure Grey to light brown with all the dust. No roads, no lights but a future ahead being sold with a view of metro and upcoming FNG highway. It was convincing enough to buy and I did try it out, but unfortunately led to a loss as stupid company faltered. Arrrgh!!

Noida: From sky scrappers touching 35 stories to studios, from triplex homes to penthouse, the prices of all opportunities are shooting high up every day. But still am trying my options (fingers crossed) with a depressing fear on history repeating itself and my mind filled with doubts on the future of homes here.

There is a saying "The more you run after something, the farther it runs from you" seems to be true as my search continues. Rates souring higher with lesser availability are some where shattering my hopes of my dream home. Supply and demand curves which I loved in graduation are coming true in my life and I am still waiting to reach equilibrium.

My logical mind often wonders, what it takes to be get a right choice at a right time but then my spiritual mind knocks and suggests, “it will happen when its supposed to happen”, but till then..

......Abodana Dhundhtey Hain, Ashiana dundhtey hain!!!

Loneliness defined!!

2010-08-31T02:00:00.000-07:00

In the midst of cries and mourning, I looked at the face of my mother and I still recall the blankness. It was 13th March 1994, a darkest day of my life. A couple whom I have seen full of love, commitment and sacrifice in the hardest of times was ripped apart by a mighty decision of God.

Chirping in the corners, jokes by the dinner side and smiles on the faces had all died and was filled with empty spaces and silent walls. We realized the value of togetherness when we looked at families around us smile, their laughter and smiles reminded us of the old times.

That is how our loneliness was defined!!

I realized loneliness as a feeling which makes us run towards relationships. We wish to be around friends to pass our weekends, we indulge in habits to kill away our time and our parents wish us to get married so that we are not left alone in life.

I often wonder why “loneliness” is such a taboo when we were all born as individuals and didn’t bring anyone along. We do become a part of some family but we never take them along when we die. What we take along is our own good/bad deeds which we have done in our lifetime.

When I see around, I see relationships break because one of them feels left alone, I have seen friendships break when people don’t give each other time and I have seen people break when they are left alone by circumstances. The fear of loneliness has unlimited consequences and has lead people to succumb to habits like drugs, addictions, bad habits and many a times suicides. But what remains after them for their families is yet the same thing, loneliness.

In the world of breakups, divorces, neglects and broken relationships caused due to loneliness do we realize the value of togetherness, the bond which god has created especially for us to make sure we are not left alone in this world. Our parents, our friends and our partners are the ones, which god has especially sent for us when he himself couldn’t give much of his attention to all.

On the contrary we often seek loneliness when we are pressurized for time. “Please leave me alone” is a sentence often spoken when we want to concentrate or are going through a sad state. Why do we need time with ourselves then, because we are individuals and we do have our own space which we often don’t cherish.

I have realized over the years that loneliness is a boon in itself and we have so many options to make the most of it. Some options are:
• Nurture our habits, past dreams and learn things which are creative.
• Help others who have been left alone by fate
• Submerge ourselves in the sake of god who has given us this beautiful life
• Spend time with children, who are a gift of god to us to relive our childhood

We never know, if our breath will flow the next second in time. So unpredictable is life and I feel we should make the most of this life and try our best to leave only smiles behind.

Har Pal yahan jee bhar jiyo, kal yeh saman fir ho na ho!!

This blog is dedicated to my mother, my pillar of strength.

Meeting Her - A little Angel !!

2010-05-12T01:45:00.000-07:00

Alarm went off at 4.30 AM, while I was already awake looking out of the window of my room at Holiday Inn Maidenhead, where am stationed since last one week. Was it eagerness to see her or the chirping of the birds which woke me up, I was not sure. I had to board a train in an hour’s time to Birmingham to meet her, my little niece Arlene.

On my last visit a few months back, she was too young to lay her eyes on me, but her recent pictures had made me feel that she might recognize me this time. Having devoted myself in work for quite a few years, I had merely forgot the emotional touch of meeting someone as close in the family.

I started to walk towards the station with a heavy bag, thanks to the official dell laptop, but no pain was felt on the shoulder, as her recent pictures floated in front of my eyes, as if she was waiting for me to arrive. Of the few things I adore about UK is the punctuality and timeliness which is followed in every aspect including travel, but unfortunately today my scheduled train was cancelled and I was standing at Reading station waiting for the next train arriving in about 30 minutes. A delay, which was sad, but I couldn’t defy.

My brother received me at the station and here I was looking at her, she greeted me with a bright and fresh smile. She held my finger as I moved my hand towards her’s and she started gurgling in her musical voice. I felt as if she was telling me all the little stories of days she spent here and telling me how much she wished we could meet. I felt she asked me about everyone back in India including her Dadi and confirmed that she would come to meet all of us soon.

When she was born, my neighborhood aunt had said that she has the same surname as mine and thus she would be more dearest to me than to my mother and yes today I could feel the love and affection for her, which was lost long back within me somewhere unknown. I sat around her most of the time, she often interacted with me with her eyes and gurgling a complaint that I didn’t bring her any gift. I went to high street to quickly pick up a few dresses for her and she wore them with a radiant awe in her eyes. She often held the frock as to show to my brother and bhabhi that I have brought it for her. How kiddish I felt, but it brought a peculiar feeling of happiness of the little gift I had bought for her.

Such innocence is what children bring to our harsh lives. They themselves bring out the feelings of love, tenderness and affection for them and we become just like them for sometime.

I often wonder how strange is our existence and life? How we are born in the womb of our mother as a seed, grow up in the hands of strange people who become our family and are submerged in earth or water after we die and leave only memories for others who survive. The soul remains alive and it becomes a part of some other family and lives on the next life.

2 eventful days passed around her, where I heard her voice, saw her smile, captured her in pictures and looked awfully when she cried and here I was standing next to her with a heavy heart to say bye. She again held my finger as if she disapproved of my release from her love and attention. But somehow I managed to steal myself from her eyes which were still looking for me when I left the house.

Back in train, while listening to songs on mobile, her recorded voice just somehow came in the play list and I could do nothing but just smile!!

I too will miss you Little Ms Dhingra and would be eager to meet you again, but we both have to wait for a while!!

Written at 2 AM on 11th May 2010, I owe this blog to her and I couldn’t sleep without completing it tonight.

Aur Karvan banta gaya!!

2010-04-04T21:37:00.000-07:00

To the endless fun which the new members have brought for us @ Route 2M.

Refering back to the GSP syndrom which has come back in the bus, after the great days of fun, I see the smiles have come back again. Earlier blog for reference :-)

http://wordless-soul.blogspot.com/2009/09/route-no2m-dumb-bond.html

It is so true of life that we live everyday and each day is like a page in a book which gets registered in our memory. We cannot live back old moments of fun and happiness but life has something new at every step for us.

Old episodes of fun and laughter were registered in my mind, when I again started sitting silent in bus. A friend is recently married and adjusting to a new life, a friend has moved on from the organisation and another friend has left the bus.
But there are a few of us left, who were a part of the gang, but feel the lull after those who were "heart of mehfil".

With increased responsibilities, lot of meetings, travel and work, I lost the touch with the gang. Today, I didnt have a meeting so just asked the gang to start again, our favorite game dumb Charades.

Invariably, the game picked up its momentum and the new joinee's in the bus joined the flow. The younger & the faster generation than us, were amazed to see the art in us, the oldies like me and I was fasinated by their enthusisam. They have brought a new angle and twist to game, with their wild imagination. But they do have less patience in enacting a movie, which becomes hard on them.

Some new exceptional skills which am proud to name:

Bad man ki lalten: He has the worst acts and always on the negative side.
innocent confusion: Thrououghly confused on the approach to express
Karo Ya Maro: Always follows do or die attitude.

While we smile together, laugh at the nuisances, share the good times together, I realise the truth of life. We come alone in this world and then are joined by people at every step in life who play a great part in our lives and these two lines summarise the thoughts within me today...

"Main akela hi chala tha janibe manzil, magar log sath aate gaye aur karvan banta gaya"

Emptiness Within!!

2010-03-09T00:58:00.001-08:00

Holiday Inn London, at 2100 hours

Standing near the window, staring for long hours on the view outside, hearing my heart beat closer to me and the emptiness within!!

A sinking feeling embeded in me in an alien land, where I didnt have my family & friends, people who are a vital part of every minute of my life. Place is known, the rules are known but you still feel alienated from all as they are not my known.

Clock shows 3 AM in India, no one is online and strangely I have not spoken a word for past 36 hours. The silence haunts and memories of the last few hours in India, circle around me.

I try to sleep, but jet lag keeps me awake. I stare in the dark and start thinking about my life.

Am so used to some people in my life with whom I spend major part of my day. I have friends, who acompany me everyday while travelling, who acompany me at lunch, with whom I share my feelings, joys and happiness . They sit next to me and we chit chat on topics, office gossips, passions in life and everyday learn something new about each other. Why am I so dependent on people around me, or is it just a way to avoid the emptiness within?

I often think, why do I work so hard, not considering any hour of the day. People call me workaholic, dedidated to the organisation and even ask me if I get paid extra of every hour. My answer is a smile, but somewhere I feel, do I keep myself busy to avoid the voice of silence and the emptiness within?

I often dream of my childhood when I was loved by all, moments of happiness where I felt I can acheive it all, the pain of lost relationships which were not meant to be mine and the darkness of future which I cannot comprehend now. At times I feel fulfilled, at times lonely, but some where deep down in heart I have started feeling - the emptiness within.

The silence of the room and the darkness of night, makes me wonder what would be my life, a few years from now? With emptiness within and no one around.

A tear drops from my eye, but I sleep as of now!!!

Mumbai, the city of dreams!!

2009-12-17T20:14:00.000-08:00

Am writing this blog in Mumbai, where am visiting for a day. An official passport to end the monotony of Delhi winters and experience the heat. The city of bollywood where stars break and make news. I have heard that Mumbai is a city of dreams, where dreams come true. I have often wondered is this the only state where people can make big, or is it just because we have Bollywood here?

As I stepped out of the airport, I could see auto rickshaw drivers dressed with a fashion statement which was seen and appreciated in 'Hero Hera lal'. They are a brand in themselves and are known to follow the meter as a rule and are pretty honest. The legendry fiat taxi's, which am sure are vintage cars now in Delhi, have still maintained their status in Mumbai. Borivalli, kandivalli, Juhu inscribed on the rear window shields of the taxi and inner walls all decked up with Bollywood star pictures.

When I noticed people on road, many of them dressed in Maharastrian dresses, I felt it is just a cultural state, like many other states in India such as Kerela, Goa, Kolkatta, Andhra etc which have their own traditional dress up. Ladies have the Veni hanging in the hair and men have a long Teeka on their forehead and most wearing Nehru Topi. But then there were others who follow Rohit Bal, Manish Malhotra’s of the fashion industry. Even men are dressed to walk on the ramp and gals have not left any cosmetic brand, untried.

Are they dressed to be hooked by some producers or director on the road, as has been heard of many hero’s like Akshay (from waiter to actor), Jackie (from street don to actor) etc. Their dreams zoom to the big bill boards on the streets where there posters would be displayed some day.

While travelling to my office, I was taken aback by the site of the slum on the way heading to the nice building on Bandra Kurla Complex, the upcoming business hub. The area stinked, there was water accumulated around the area, there was a huge dump of garbage which was full of flies and then there were some kids playing just next to the bin. The big hygiene campaigns advertisements rolled in front of my eyes, in which big stars often talk about what best facilities should be provided to children of India.

I wonder, what would be the dreams of these children, to get stomach full food everyday, or wear a school dress some day and go to school. Some of them might actually be working in the Bollywood serving tea/drinks to the superstars everyday and sometime being thrashed for not doing it professionally.

Next morning when I reached VT station at 8.30AM, it was a pool of people and nothing but the people, which I often see on TV, as a representative of Mumbai. People running, pushing and struggling to reach there work location or earn a living for the day, many of them from middle class who cannot afford to buy a car. Some of their dreams would be to save enough money to afford a house in the increasing real estate prices, a good school for their children and other such basic needs which are impacted due to ever increasing population and limited amenities.

Are these the impacts of Mumbai being a city of dreams, which makes people leave their luxuries and successful careers to be a part of this city. It is not deniable that Mumbai has all the opportunities for the people with creative talent because Bollywood and its adjacent industry – Music, Investment, production, Advertisement, Marketing – create all the opportunities. And there have been stars who have made big here, starting from scratch and establishing themselves to big names. I wonder what percentage of them actually become successful, while rest of them still continue to live on to achieve it some day.

And what happens to those who have it all. Would they will always be as successful as they are today. There have been some, who have had good times but in their old age they died without recognition. People forget their name, their contributions and for the new generations they are almost extinct. What is the span of the fame, which they all are running after and where their dreams take them eventually!!

But these instances, cases, situations don’t deter people from following their dreams and landing into Mumbai. And the most encouraging part is the magic in the city which makes it possible. It was true for me as well, as I got to meet Bobby Doel, my favorite hero at the Mumbai airport.
A long cherished dream which came true, Thanks to Mumbai, the city of dreams!!

10 years have passed!!!

2009-10-14T23:30:00.000-07:00

I had a strange feeling yesterday when someone asked me “Where do you stay?”. I told him that I stay in Rohini which is around 40 kms from Noida. He asked me don’t you get tired traveling this much every day. And I told him that I have been traveling this route for 10 years now.

10 years!!!…I reflected is a really long time which I have spent on this route. From Mathura road to Noida, I have almost been taking the same route every day. But each day seems to be my first day to office when I was thrilled to join my new job.

When I started, “my savari” was the local blue line buses racing around each other for passengers. The dirt, smell and oogling eyes were a part of my daily routine. I always used to be so busy struggling to get a secure place to stand and avoid looking at the people around me. I remember running after the buses and changing two buses to reach office on time but it was the most irritating time of the day for me. But as it was the cheapest mode to travel, it was the only option with that salary.

One day a mail was floated in office for car pools and I thought I would attempt to join one so replied to the mail. A girl mailed me for the car pool and we planned to meet at the cafeteria. It was funny meeting as she asked me “which car do you have” and I said I thought you have a car. We laughed and then she introduced me to a chartered bus which used to come from our area, brand Ruby.

Chartered buses a very popular medium of travel then and my “second savari”, had its own strange environment. Aunties used to gossip about their in laws and uncles were busy discussing office politics. But sometimes when they looked up from their discussions, they tried to make friends with people like us from corporate. The agenda for such friendly approach always used to be either evaluation of this generation to theirs or sizing us up for their sons/daughters who are eligible for marriage. I still remember some names from NTPC Kalia ji, Mr. Sharma and one sardarji uncle. Along with them was Anita ji who was a jhansi ki rani from the security team of our company. She had all the news on who was mostly seen in the cafeteria, who is soon going to run away with whom.

Those people actually became a part of my every day travel but along with them was the road, the monuments which I started noticing as I was not busy avoiding that single touch and oogles. Over the years I have seen a lot of new constructions including the metro, fly away bridges, road crossing posts, building renovations and new structures coming on the route. It has changed from a primitive city to a highly modernized city, thanks to the common wealth and Delhi Sarkar.

But few things which have not changed are big Jams, people sleeping on the road, water logging on the roads in rains, people parking their vehicles on the flyover to bow to Hanuman ji and many such things which I might not have noticed.

When I reflect back, most of my best friends, I have met on this route. One of my best friends actually met me when our bus was broken and she had to face a lot of rain with me. I was the new joinee that day and the bus was broken on the way. We took an auto, but it was stuck in water logging, then another auto which met with an accident and then we literally walked on the road in the heaviest rain of the season.

One these roads, she had taught me how to drive my car which was my “third savari” after some progression in the corporate world. She guided me on the driving tips, alternates and made me confident to face the Delhi roads and the world in general. I was so afraid to driver that I often use to give it up especially after my first accident, but she gave the strength and tact to keep moving. Then she fortunately got enrolled in one of the best universities in US and moved on, but here I was driving confidently on the route.

My “fourth savari” now is my office bus, where I have met some good people who are a vital part of my life, but along with them are the roads, the monuments, the renovations and the Big Jams.

Today, I thought I would capture this route, the road, the instances and monuments which have steadily been with me. Every day I see them wishing me a warm welcome and a very good morning.

Do you have Vitamin Deficiency!!!

2009-10-06T04:41:00.000-07:00

I have recently learnt a concept of progressive elaboration, so am attempting to write this blog in progression as I complete the book “How to Get what you want and want what you have” by John Gray (Famous writer of Men are from Mars and Women from Venus).

It has this interesting concept of life requiring a set of vitamins in our 10 love tanks. It is elaborated that while we live, we have need to have all our 10 love tanks filled to be satisfied. Following are the vitamins, their description and age timelines.

Vitamin G1 - Love and support from God - Conception to birth
Vitamin P1 – Love and Support from our parents - Birth to 7
Vitamin F - Love and Support Family, Friends and having fun - 7 to 14
Vitamin P2 - Love and Support Peers and others like us with similar goals - 14 to 21
Vitamin S - Love and support from ourselves - 21 to 28
Vitamin R - Love and Support Relationships, Partnerships and romance - 28 to 35
Vitamin D - Love and support from some one who is dependent on us - 35 to 40
Vitamin C - Giving back to our communities - 41 to 49
Vitamin W - Giving back to the world - 49 to 56
Vitamin G2 - Serving god - 56 and Beyond

John suggests that we often have a deficiency of a particular vitamin, due to which one of our love tanks is not filled and we feel dissatisfied. An interesting statistics he has highlighted is, a higher percentage of divorces happening around 28 for those who got married in their Self Love age (21 to 28). They feel the deficiency of not having lived their life and blame the partner for what they are missing within themselves.

Hey don’t push your marriages till 28 reading this, but might be you would be able to appreciate the family life when you have loved yourself or are well connected with yourself!!!

As I further read the book, I understood for most difficulties in life the solution starts with making sure we are filling the first five love tanks. By taking sometime out of our week to fill our past love tanks, we are able to move forward to create the life we want. If you have flowers in your garden, it is not enough to water then once, we need to regularly attend to them and keep nurturing them. Following description provides the symptom for identifying your unfilled tank, remedy to fill the tank and suggests a mode to achieve the same.

Vitamin G1: Love and support from God

Symptoms: Life tends to be a struggle; we become stressed and tired thinking that we have to do it ourselves.

Remedy: Connect with god to realize we are not alone and there is a higher power assisting us.

Mode: Meditation.

Vitamin P1: Love and support from parents

Symptoms: We tend to be held back in by feelings of doubt, inadequacy and unworthiness, waves of emotional disturbance and distress in our lives.

Remedy: Need to get someone to listen to you, understand you and give you unconditional love. As this tank begins to fill you become more supportive to you yourself.

Mode: Therapists or counselors or friends act as hired parents and some healing exercises

Vitamin F: Love and support from family, friends and fun

Symptoms: Life is too serious and you are not having fun. It feels your primary relationship suffers from criticism, blame or boredom.

Remedy: Need to nurture our old friendships and create new ones. Old friends help us love and accept ourselves the way we are and new friends bring out new parts of what we are. Humour, funny movies and having fun is additional ways of filling this tank.

Mode: If you don’t have many friends, start doing things for others. By first giving and then receiving in return you gradually begin to like each other and become friends.

Vitamin P2: Peer support

Symptoms: Loneliness, too confined to the family

Remedy: You should nurture your interests separate from your partner and join some group activities. It helps awaken the teenager in you and you will have surges of enthusiasm, vitality and energy to move ahead in life.

Mode: Attend a game of your favorite sports team in a stadium, movies in cinemas, theatres, religious activities, concerts of favorite singers.

Vitamin S: Self Love

Symptoms: Much of the time we hold ourselves back because we are concerned about what others will think of us. We want to do things, but we don’t because if we make mistake we would reminded of it forever.

Remedy: To love yourself give yourself permission to experiment in life. Get away from people in your everyday life, so that you are free to try on new outfits and behave differently. Give yourself the freedom, to do things you have never done before and go somewhere you would never go again.

Mode: Take a few minutes everyday to reflect on what you want and then set your intentions by putting in your order.

Vitamin R: Relationships, partnerships and romance

Symptoms: You are not able to decide on a partner or likewise in a relationship, after a while love stops flowing.

Remedy: In either case, it means your other love tanks are not filled. If you are not getting the right partner, you are looking in the wrong direction. Just start dating and don’t look for the perfect person. When a student is ready a teacher is always there. Similarly, when you are ready for a relationship and you are open to dating, the perfect person shows up. Soul mates are never perfect, but they are perfect for you as a partner.

Mode: Learn relationship skills.

Vitamin D: Unconditional love to someone who is depending on you.

Symptoms: Without children, unknowingly sabotage a relationship or the possibility of a new relation by over nurturing and treating a partner like a child.

Remedy: Being responsible for the needs of others is a essential requirement of the soul. By feeling responsible and giving your love unconditionally your soul will be strengthened.

Mode: Take care of children, grandchildren, pets and gardens. It means taking care of anything alive.

Vitamin C: Giving back to the community, assisting in making world a better place.

Symptoms: Unable to expand your spirit

Remedy: thinking about helping others. The gifts we have received from life are the gifts we have to share with our community. This kind of giving can be so gratifying that we forget the other people we love, so be careful and not neglect your family in the process.

Mode: volunteer work to help others not directly related to you.

Vitamin W: Giving back to the world

Symptoms: Many people start feeling old because they are not expanding and thus not growing.

Remedy: By connecting and sharing yourself with other cultures, you will discover that although people are different but we are all the same inside. Seeing the world will bring out new parts of who you are and will keep you young.

Mode: Get involved in some kind of world cause like travel, see the world and share your light.

Vitamin G2: Serving god.

Symptoms: Many people immediately age and get sick at this time, because their other tanks are too empty to fulfill this new requirement to give selflessly in service.

Remedy: This is time when we reach our full glory. Now we can be in touch with our greatest powers and gifts. By now all your love tanks have been filled and your greatest joy is in serving. As you enjoy this state, you feel more and more that you are one with everything and everyone. You become a pure channel of God’s grace to all you meet.

Mode: Serve and connect with God.

It is interesting theory though and would encourage you to just think - Are your love tanks filled? “do you love yourself?” and “have you been content with your family”, “are you happy with your career” or are you facing any such symptoms. If yes, then would encourage you to apply the remedies as suggested.

The book has a lot more details on Meditation methodologies, how to understand your desire etc and would suggest all of us should atleast read it once to know ourselves more.

Happy reading!!!!

What's your Rashee!!

2009-09-27T23:34:00.000-07:00

Ashutosh Gwarikar, was the reason why I thought I would try out this movie, which was 3 hours long and had 2 intermissions. Yes, you read it right, 2 intermission out of which 2nd intermission explicitly looks like from censor board. But before you read further, we should congratulate Priyanka Chopra ,who has done a commendable job in each of the roles. She has made it a must see movie, if you often relate people with their Rashee!!.

An interesting thought to ponder was, why is the movie based on females? It could have been be a gal looking for a man. Is it because we have Male dominated society or because only women have different colors/shades?. No debates please, just a thought.

Am not going to reveal the story as many of you still have to see the movie, but some facets which you should watch for and may like to discuss on this blog (as comments).

As you all would have read in the newspaper, its about 12 gals or 12 rashee which he plans to meet based on a book he reads while he is awake at night (affected by US Jet Lag).

While I assumed they are showing it by birthdates, but mum identified it was accordingly to name (she reads both horoscopes :-)). So, I picked up the Hindi Magazine to check the Rashee and their matching alphabets, but as I don’t remember most of the names, so can be wrong in the blog.

Please be sure you understand it that way, and note the names as they announce the name of the gal before every planned meeting. Just for your help (as am sure you don’t read Hindi papers/magazines), following were the alphabets of the characters and my interpretation of their traits.

A - Aries - Pure Heart
V - Taurus - Evaluating/Hidden personality
K - Gemini - Confused/Chirpy
H - Cancer - Very Honest/Clings to past
M - Leo - Aggressive
P - Virgo - Selfless
R - Libra - Too Practical/Logical
N - Scorpio - Passionate
B - Sagittarius - This is edited
J - Capricorn - Sober/Simple
S - Aquarius - Open Minded/Smart/Practical
C - Pisces - Living in their world

S was the Rashee I could relate myself to the most and hey boasting is allowed on one's own blog!!

In the movie, it would be interesting to see how Ashoutosh has actually maintained the respect for each Rashee as he mentioned in the disclaimer . To enable that, the best approach he took was not to highlight much on the characteristics of the Rashee, but the situations these women were actually in. Some were very successful career wise, some devoted to our country and some living just in their past.

Then there were some social issues which were highlighted, how women are pushed into marriage for emotional support, for money, for family sake and some are even made to fake their identity. It also, highlighted the issues of dowry, adolescent marriages, and reasons why marriage becomes a contract for some.

All women can be seen sailing through their situations, either themselves of through some help. They all have dreams which they wish to achieve and Marriage is not the only thing in a women's life today. It is important, but not a compulsion anymore. Another aspect is the realization for some parents, who always underestimate what a woman can be, if she is able/allowed to choose.

But it also highlighted the fact that it is very difficult to make a decision as you are not able to judge a person in 10 minutes or a day which you get to decide. Also, the dilemma men face when they meet women, who are as competitive as they are. Can they compromise their career, preferences etc for a gal, if they are expecting the same from them.

And finally, what is the basis on which we should make a decision. Or it is just a destiny!!! (“Marriage…a quest of destiny” – March 2008).

You all would be inferring the end from your perspective, but I could relate theme of the movie to the words of a acquaintance I met once, who said "We should not typecast ourselves to the LINDA traits, as every individual is quite unique and each on of us is a precious drop in the ocean(THIS WORLD)".

I also realized, that it is not our horoscopes but the situations in which we are that make us what we are, rather than our Rashee!!!.

But but….I would still continue reading LINDA, as it helps to understand a person at times.

So, Enjoy to movie and do send me your comments.

Ever Noticed the World Around Us!!!

2009-09-24T10:26:00.000-07:00

On the way to office I often notice people around me, in the bus, on the road or in different vehicles. The faces I see everywhere never match each other. Its makes me appreciative of god's creation, thinking how many mould's he has to give us such different shapes. We are here in different colors, bound in different religions and customs, though our blood and the scientific constitution of the body is same, but still we are so different.

On the long distance, I see their faces and notice their expression changing from neutral to smiling and at times a tiny drop appearing in their eyes. Are they smiling because they are happy, or thinking something silly they did today and when they cry is it some pain or remembering someone they loved. It is just like a newly born baby, who people presume is in his/her own world. Babies dont know how to speak, but its only their expressions which we can interpret.

I often notice people looking out of the window, though their eyes are just looking at the objects around, but is their mind also on what they are seeing. Are they appreciating the beauty of nature, looking for some nice faces or something else. A few friends told me that they are just talking to themselves or analyzing themselves and some are making some plans for the hours to come but their mind is consistently working.

I often notice couples driving together to work. One partner is trying to make a communication while the other is silent. When a person is silent, no one knows what is going in their mind, what are they thinking or concentrating on. And there are couples who are laughing and giving each other attention. It makes me eager to know about their relationship, how long they have been together and would they be soon like other silent couples once they have spent some good time together. Are they happy together or just adjusted to each other or is silence the only thing between them.

A friend once told me a quote, "He who does not understand your silence will probably not understand your words" but I wonder how does he expect someone to know what he is feeling. How can someone know, is he silent because he is happy, or because he is sad or might be angry with someone. Some say face is the mirror of the mind, but how do we read faces and their mind.

On the roads, I notice people heading towards somewhere, some people driving fast, impatiently changing lanes as if they are in a hurry. A friend says, it seems as if no one is satisfied and its a rat race either in traffic or in real life. Everybody is trying to win the race and ones own win is not that important as others defeat is. Are all of us heading towards a direction or a just on the go, what is the destination we have to reach or we would just keep walking.

Then I notice my friends with whom I interact everyday, they smile with you, laugh with you but they have a different story behind them each day. What they are expressing, is what they are feeling today or are they just faking it. Your colleague sitting just next to you, does he like you or somewhere has a grudge with you, is he your friend or a foe. Sometimes you feel they are the best of your friends and you can trust them, but some unfortunate day your trust is broken.

These instances which I see everyday and the estranged world around me which is full of humans like me - some of whom I know, some of whom I wish to know and those I see & forget everyday - makes me wonder "why do we hate others, if we are alike(humans)", "why do we like others, if we look different", "why do we become silent in a relationship, when we chose it ourselves", "why are we running against each other, if we have the same destination(death)" and "why is the world like this or it could have been different".

If you have ever noticed the world around us, can you tell me...."Yehi duniya hai to aisi yeh duniya kyun hai, yehi hota hai to akhir yehi hota kyun hai"

.... With due regards to friends who contributed to the thoughts in the blog!!!!

Majma!!

2009-09-07T21:40:00.000-07:00

Woh doston ki mehfil, woh yaaron ka majma
yaad aata hai, woh milke hansna
Hanste hanste zameen pe ludakna

Woh mausam alag they woh lamhe alag
beet gaye woh din jaise falak

kash woh lamhe tham jatey waheen
woh dost na bichad jatey kaheen

Par aaj woh din fir aya yahan
khul ke kissi ne hansya yahan
ansu nikle aye ankhon se yun
woh mausam laut ayen ho jyun

Ab dil chata hai,yeh pal na hon juda
ye doston ki mehfil sajtee rahe sada

Or hum yuhin hanstey rahein sada!!!!

"Those were the days" are very common words I have heard from many people around me. We all have good memories of our past. Some remember school days and some are appreciative of the college days. A carefree life for all, with love in the air for some and non stop fun times for others. Boys learned all the vices and skills to flirt around with gals. Girls learned all the ada's and getting more attention from boys. But there are some who come along just like that.

It is the time we start understanding the meaning of being a friend and build an unforgettable bond. The times spent together, the jokes and the incidents often come in our talks and we reflect on the past.

As we move on, we make new friends, similar feelings emerge again and we start spending time together, but old friends always remain within our hearts. But fotunately today, we do have great websites like orkut, facebook etc which keeps us all connected and the hearts are filled with joy to know about them, see their kids and smile on their new experiences.

Those times, those people who are long gone might not come along, these Majma's would again be forgone, but it makes this wonder writer wonder..."agle mode pe na jane mile jaye kon"!!!.

Route No.2M - A Dumb Bond

2009-09-01T02:39:00.000-07:00

Dedicated to all the Members of Route No. 2M.

Route No. 2M plying from Noida Sector 125 to Rohini is a 1.5 hrs journey from the company to our homes. When I joined the bus after a long stint away from the same, it was a quite affair. Nokia Express 5310 and a headphone were the companions aboard and it was all about me and my thoughts.

I noticed people around me, some used to gossip, some sleeping and some looking out from the window, don’t know finding what. I called this phenomenon GSP - G(Gossip), S(sleeping) and P(Peeping) syndrome.

One day a new member joined our bus. He was/is a smiley, white and tall guy, a typical Punju with a slight Punjabi ascent in English. As is said about Punju's, they love to smile and live to eat, he couldn’t very well adjust to the GSP syndrome. He used to look, notice the GSP group and wonder where to start.

He caught up with a small group of members who together started a popular game "Dumb Charades". The group started enacting movies, deciding the rules of game and invariably making a lot of noise.

The GSP group was amused to see the enthusiasm after a 9 hours long work and wondered the reason for the stored energy. I happen to notice them play one day where a member was enacting the movie "Rakhwale". He raised one finger upwards and a thumb down, which I understood means one word and Hindi. He identified a unique way to describe the movie, a gun fighter who is placed on the India & Pakistan border and is protecting the country. No body could bring out the typical Hindi word he was expecting so he went for a sound's like which was more interesting to see and interpret.

He highlighted all of us as in family relations which is commonly known as "Gharwale" and a person shouted Rakhwale. I could see the frustration of the enactor and different thoughts of the interpreters. Some were right on target to understand, others gave weird answers.

Though I had never till then attempted to play it, but it invariably made me think of how would I do it if I were to enact or interpret? It made me realize though the dictionary meaning of the word dumb is “lacking intelligence or good judgment”, but it needs quite intelligent and logical method of enacting actions to act like a dumb. But, it also brought in me the depressing feeling of thinking about people who cannot speak and can only express themselves through actions.

Slowly many members of the GSP group started interpreting in their minds, and their eyes would be hooked towards the person who was enacting. Now most of the members have moved out of the GSP syndrome and actively participate, either enacting or interpreting. I got pulled to the group, when I successfully interpreted one word, Urdu movie. Since then, am involved in the fun and somehow feel the same energy after a 9 hours day, which I was earlier amused on.

Everyday, each one of us wait for the time when we would be together again in the bus, some idle moments in the day are spent googling for movie names and trying to find the most difficult movie name possible. Members also try to enact a simple movie in a more interesting way to make other annoyed and eventually happy. Members have especially changed their bus routes, try to come by bus and some of them getting down early, frown on the arrival of their stops as they are crucially placed in interpreting the movie. Few members in the group have been identified for their quite interesting skills. Introducing a few here

Mr. Expert: Who has an expert/critical opinion on the interpretation
Tadipar: Who don’t give a valid movie or give simple movies
Encyclopedia: Well know interpreter of typical Hindi/Urdu words
Dictionary: A content full of Hindi movies names dating back to 1920's
Latest Dictionary: She knows the latest movie names as a zap.

This game today has created a unique bond - "A dumb Bond" among the members of the bus whom we scantily know as a person, but we do know what they are good at in dumbing!!!!

Wish to Lose weight now, ask me how!!

2009-01-30T21:01:00.000-08:00

Its said, Losing weight is a thought which is difficult to erase from a woman's mind, but today it has become imperative for any individual who wants to make an impression. Traditional methods of losing have been religious fast which force you to develop resistance towards temptation. But for those like me who cannot stay empty stomach all day, here is a tried and tested method to loose faster while eating all day. But a word of caution, as excess of everything is bad, dont use it as a tool to zero down at once. And do remember the only solution to a better figure is a brisk walk or regular excercise but these diets can be used as a solution to fit into that favourite dress which you want to wear at the party.

So, for all my fellow friends who wish to have six to 10 packs on the lines of Mr. Salu, Sharukh and Aamir and zero figures as of Aish, Kareena am sharing my tested healthy way to loose.

This program is designed for a target weight loss of 5-6 Kg. per week. It will also improve your attitude and emotions because of its systematic cleaning effects. The effectiveness of this seven day plan is that the foods eaten burn more calories than they give to the body in caloric value. This plan can be used as often as you like to without any fear of complications. It is designed to flush your system of impurities and give you a feeling of well being. After seven days you will begin to feel lighter by atleast 5 . You will have an abundance of energy and an improved disposition.

During the seven days you must drink 10 glasses of water each day. Complement this plan with a 45 mins walk and you would get better results.
DAY ONE: All fruits except bananas. Your first day will consist of all fruits you want. It is suggested you consume lots of melons the first day, especially watermelon and cantloupe.
DAY TWO: All vegetables. You are encouraged to eat all raw and cooked vegetables of your choice. There is no limit on the amount of type. Avoid oil and coconut while cooking vegetables. Have large boiled potato for breakfast.
DAY THREE: Any mixture of fruits and vegetables of your choice. Any amount, any quantity. No bananas yet and no potatoes today.
DAY FOUR: Banana and milk. Today you will eat as many as eight bananas and drink three glasses of milk. You can also have 1 bowl of vegetable soup.
DAY FIVE: Today is feast day. You will eat 1 cup of rice. You also have to eat about six whole tomatoes and drink 12 glasses of water today to cleanse your system of the excess uric acid you will be producing.
DAY SIX: Today is another all vegetables day. You must eat 1 cup of rice today and eat all the vegetable you want cooked and uncooked to your hearts content.
DAY SEVEN: Today your food intake will consist of 1 cup rice, fruit juice and the vegetables you care to consume. Tomorrow morning you will be five Kgs lighter than 1 week ago.

If you desire further weight loss, repeat the program again. Repeat the program as often as you like, however, it is suggested that you rest for three days before every repetition.

And hey do share your comments after the successful attempt. Happy Losing!!!!

Kerela - Nature's Paradise

2008-12-29T20:32:00.000-08:00

This blog is dedicated to all honeymooners, families, friends who would like to contribute to Indian tourism by embracing our nature’s paradise – Kerela.

I would first like to introduce you to the members whose name you would be often reading in the blog. I the author of this blog took my mum and a friend for a ride on this trip. Mr Attapan we called him Anthony was our driver for the entire trip and our organizers were Mir tours from Kerela(wish I can get some money for their advertisement here). There are few more critical members whom I would introduce as and when they would be required to appear.

Kerela, the mystic land of green and Satyuga was the destination most sought after a lot of diligence. A much desired holiday of the year was impacted strongly by various problems, starting from Mum's election duty to a large deal at my office, Terrorist attacks at Mumbai, followed by a threat of air attack on the deemed day of travel in the name of Babri Masjid anniversary. However, we did a SWOT analysis of the situation and decided to go ahead with the trip as planned.
Strengths – My weight in KGs,
Weakness – My friend’s in KGs,
Opportunities – to travel under high security and meet our Heroic NSG commandos
Threats – we would lose a lot of money if we didn’t go
Our Friends, family and colleagues shared the sense of threat with us and did wish us a best of luck and a great holiday while my boss was envious of my 9 days of leave at a stretch (another threat at recession time J).

6th December 08, 12 Noon, Delhi

Easycab group - can be reached at 42424242 - relieved us a bit of our tensions by sending us a Logan, a kind of luxury cab to take us to the airport. And we started towards the airport enjoying the spacious luxury ride along with a discussion on how many days we can survive on Idli & Dosa and the south Indian heat.

All kudos to Indian government (we voted for them on 29th) for the layers of security checks which took us around 2 hours before we reached the boarding gate. November being a marriage month there were many newly wed couples, some strange some smart enough to be oogled at. Me and my friend discussed the color of some husbands which were contrasting with their wives and weight of some wives which was contrasting with their husbands. But one couple x 2 retained our attention for a while as the hubbies have competed with their wives for the Mehendi which was extending to their elbows. Rajasthan was the place they had come from and were making as much noise as possible to get them noticed. A proper page three experience!!!

Around 7 PM, Cochin

I didn’t talk much about the flight but it was Jetlite which was delayed by three hours already and we didn’t even get a proper glass of water to drink until we ordered something from their menu which was actually costly and also tasted bad. You know what am hinting you!!! J

Mr Attapan aka Anthony was the man who we had come to pick us up at the airport and there he was standing with a paper showing my name as if waiting for a diplomat (its good to feel special when you spend so much). He was a very very “very” thin man with semi bald head and average height but his smile large enough for us to see after a tiring journey. He told us to move towards the car parking and we were expecting an Indica as per our package but were very happy to see a silver colored Logan again. The first word Anthony spoke to us was “Hindi ata hai”??

Though we reached Cochin late, but Anthony made sure that we didn’t miss much of the action on the MG road which is the most popular road in most of the cities in India. While in Delhi it is more known for beautiful gals emanating from college, but here we found grand shopping plaza’s and big hoardings with Gold plated models(gold is very popular there). I fortunately remembered a location called marine drive which was a sea side view in Cochin. It was not comparable to the marine drive of Mumbai, but one thing we found most touching was the charts which were put up by residents in remembrance of UnniKrishanan, the brave man who lost his life saving many of us in Mumbai. The hoardings wrote Apologies to the parents of UnniKrishnan for the behavior toward this young martyr, their only son.

With the heavy sigh we moved towards the car and Anthony took us to one of the famous restaurants in Cochin for our dinner. We took a south Indian thali and a plate of idli and were astonished to see a bill of just Rs. 162 which is very uncommon for a whole meal for three people in Delhi. Let me introduce to you the range of spices which were there in the food and please take some pudin hara if you don’t have a appetite for very spicy food. Ending the dinner with a south Indian pan which was served complimentary we were really willing to hit the bed after a tiring day. Thus we didn’t spare a talk with the hotel receptionist or a brief look around in admiration of the only 4 star hotel of our trip “Pearl Continental”. Please don’t think that it was a bad hotel, the room was really nice but just one factor which killed it was that it was next to the railway station and trains spared no sympathy toward very tired guests of the hotel. We zapped around the south Indian channels to find our favorite program “Kaante ki takkar” on Sony for some hearty laughs before closing eyes to the day.

7th December 08, 8 AM

We started for a 3.5 hour scenic/picturesque drive to Munnar as per the description in the itinerary. But it was indeed a beautiful view starting initially with a lot of green palm trees and spreads of green carpet. Soon we started climbing the hills. The first destination we reached was Cheeyappara Falls which was similar to views generally we get when we travel to Northern hill stations, so we preferred to pass by the same. Next was Kallar Falls on the right where we again insisted to move ahead but Anthony was adamant on the next falls named Valara Falls. He stopped the car against our protests and showed us a way to move towards the water. We found the path and mum guided us through the path handholding as if we are going to school for the first time.

After modeling around the falls and training Anthony “the best of photography skills” using our camera we moved ahead to the next view point up on the hills - Karadippara View Point. The wind has become a bit cool but the sun tended to be stronger than the winds and kept the wind bearable. Bhutta, was the thing we really needed in the weather but two more instances struck us hard. One was the automation of Bhutta making process in which he used a motor to blow into the fire which was ignited using wood as compared to coal which is often see in Delhi. Second was red chill powder which has a big vote there and that was the Masala which was used to garnish the automated heated Bhutta. It was our second encounter with the spicy dishes since we entered Kerela. Though unknowingly we missed Pine Apple Garden and Rubber Plantations on the way somewhere but we opted not to visit Spice Plantations which we did a bit later though.

After checking into the hotel(Abad Copper Castle), we evaluated the massage rates in the hotel’s ayurvedic center and found them quite high. Kerela for those who are unaware, is famous for many ayurvedic centers but beware of false doctors is what we read while in Delhi. Sirodhara we had read was one of the famous massages performed only for head but it is very relaxing for the mind. Anthony had suggested us to get it done outside and we did found 10% difference in the price in the city, Munnar. He took us to Maurya Ayurvedic center which he suggested was a good option and in fact it was. We booked an appointment for 4 PM and reached Mahavira restaurant for our 3rd spicy encounter, but this time we were smart enough to request them to make it less spicy. You need to have a hours gap between your lunch and massage time so we finished the lunch at 2 PM and then Anthony took us to a flower Garden which had a exotic range of flowers for interest of any horticulturist. Am sure honeymooners would not be encouraged to visit it neither were we, but we had to kill an hour. We also clicked some snaps in woods on the way to Munnar and enacted some sequences of QSQT.

After the massage and a good amount on ayurvedic oils in our hair we visited a Historical Church which was on a small hill giving us a glimpse of old times. International Blossom(Hydel)
Park was on our way back to the hotel but we skipped it after the earlier Bagaban we had opted to see.

8th December 08, 6 AM Munnar

Me and my friend went for a stroll uphill around the hotel. View was fabulous and later we realized it was pothemedu view point which we had to come for sunset view. At the view point a gentlemen was doing “ALOM VILOM” in the early morning winds while we were tempted to run away with his sweater. But running down the hills is a bit dangerous to attempt early morning so dishearted we went downhill and clicked some snaps in tea estate claiming ourselves as THE TATAs.

After morning breakfast, we departed for a full day sight seeing tour and the first spot was Rajamalai (Eravikulam) National Park – famous for Nilgiri Tahr(Wild goat). Mum and the wild goat became friends as she was calling her “Rajamalaiiiiiiii” in rhythm and she came towards us to strike a pose. After a good glimpse of the goats and the hills around we came down at the bus station. While waiting for the bus which takes you back from this national park to parking lot, we were witness of some love madness. There was a couple - the gal wearing a red top and Capri in 10 degrees along with red footwear - clicking snaps in varied poses. One strange pose was where he held the gal high in his arms, strong man I must say. All around were laughing and gossiping, but they say love is blind….

Anaimudi Peak – South India's Highest Peak was supposed to be around this national park which we but we later realized the same so would recommend that ask your driver to take you there as well. We moved into the car and the next destination was Madupetty Dam and Lake where we boarded a speed boat for 15 minutes for Rs. 300, a special/explicit honeymooner’s rate. The driver of the boat attempts to make you enjoy the thrill by tilting the boat at angles where you can enjoy the lake water.

We moved ahead to a Photo Point, Elephant Arrival Spot, Cinema Shooting Point which were actually a picturesque view of the place but nothing much to stop and enjoy, but there you can take a elephant ride but at Rs. 300 for 15 mins, seems to be a pattern right?

Echo Point we assumed to be a high peak where you would throw your lungs out thinking that the voice would echo. But it was a low lying lake an extension of the Madupetty Dam water. We chose to do some shopping rather than boating and while enjoying pineapple - with a dash of unavoidable chilli masala ;-( - we heard a strong man’s voice shouting “ Manjoooooooo”. We shared a laugh and the voice was heard again “Manjooooo” and this time we went ahead and saw the couple and their honeymoonic acts. Another couple with them were clicking their snaps where the guy was holding his (strong bodied) wife in his arms like the song..Jiski biwi choti..god mein utha lo …..J… Would recommend you do some rounds to the gym before you actually get married as it would be tested sooner or later J.

Next spot Gundala Lake and Headworks DAM were next to each other but weather had worsened and it started raining so we started back towards hotel. Tata Tea Museum was closed on Monday and evening Spice/Tea trailing at Munnar was nothing but a walk for which we went in the morning. But the weather was not with us so we preferred to come back enjoy the view from our hotels which was mostly covered by clouds by now giving us a heaven like feeling. My friend preferred to go for Sirodhara while I enjoyed the view from my hotel’s balcony. It is worth a view if you are in hills and more relaxing than sirodhara in which 1.5 litre oil is poured on your head(very hard to wash off). We did go to Munnar city every night to torture ourselves with spicy food but today we tried LAZZA(brand) ice cream to relieve our north Indian sensitive stomachs.

9th December 08, 8 AM

We started our onwards journey towards alleppey early because it was a 5 hours drive but we planned to visit the spice garden which we had missed earlier. Same road takes you back to Cochin and then towards alleppey through Cochin bypass. Spice garden was a place to be, as he showed us how spices like – cardamom, black pepper, clove, ginger, turmeric grow along with some fruits such as pineapple etc. Guide showed us a plant which is called all spices which can be used as a leaf in your curries and you don’t need to add any other spices not even salt. Strange but true!!!

The Drive to alleppey was very very long but we covered the journey learning some malyali from Anthony especially the words which represent money like Rs. 100 which is called “Noora”. Alleppey is known as a charming village on the Vembanadu Lake and it is known for its azure backwaters, swaying palms, and floating houseboats. On arrival we checked into Kettuvallam the ethnic name for a famous Kerala Houseboat and started on with our journey towards the lake. We took a video of the house boat which was a one bed boat launched on 29th November and ours was the second trip after three Malaysian gals. Unni our houseboat pilot was very friendly and knew hindi. He allowed us to drive the houseboat and feel special. Though we couldn’t do justice to the profession but it was still good driving than on Delhi roads.

Lunch was supposed to be served at Houseboat by our cook onboard and we were already very hungry but so were our eyes to see the view. Cruise was supposed to take us through the unique web of lakes, lagoons, canals and river but the first spot was to visit the Snake Boat where the house boat was stationed for lunch. At lunch we were served Kerela kadi, beans, dal, roti, rice, papad and we had fortunately told our cook with us on board to use sunflower oil rather than coconut oil which we had heard is a bit weird to taste(spices still persisted). Just after lunch as we were about to disembark to see Historical Church, Paddy Field, Kuttanadan Region the only region cultivate rice below sea level there was rain all over us. It continued for two hours while we cursed and enjoyed the rain, but we lost time enough to enjoy the backwaters ride. After two hours our houseboat moved towards the houseboat junction where it was stationed for the night. But our enthusiasm was not affected by the rain and we took a ride in a small canoe in the lake around us. Unni negotiated with the canoe driver on the price, who shouted “Noor”, but Unni told us Rs. 150 keeping his cut. But we knew the word “Noora” and were smart enough to decide on Rs. 100 only. Unni made a face and we realized knowing the local language does help. Sun was almost setting but the rain poured again and the canoe pilot saved us by sparing some umbrellas and while getting down we wished him “Namni”(means shukriya). The spectacular sunset was almost missed by the time we came back to the house boat and it was all dark now. We were served evening snacks that is kela pakoda(they are sweet and not spicy) and coffee. All CDs on the houseboat were of malyali movies and we just had one option to watch Mustafa with our co-spectators, “Mosquitoes”. Cook our host on board, gave us an option to choose between oil and coil to avoid the mosquitoes and we chose to use Mortein coil to avoid the tiny beasts.

Dinner was served at around 9 but it was not candle light dinner. We wound up the movie after dinner and ran towards the AC room to take a nap after a long day. We were told the bed would be decorated so would recommend honeymooners to avail this deal in the package which we couldn’t :-).

10th December 08, 5.30 AM Alleppey

Alarm went loud and we could see no light outside the window, but we still moved out of the room to view the sun rise, as we had already missed the sunset. It was a great view with sun rays shining slowly to give a reddish look to the sky. Fishermen soon started to cross our houseboat for their work and some waved hand at us, “beautiful gals with eyes half open”. We clicked some snaps and continued to enjoy the rising sun with a morning coffee sip. At around 8 AM Unni came back and kettuvalam disembarked to reach the junction where we started from. On the way we clicked snaps, videos had our breakfast and reached the junction where Anothny was waiting for us. We bid farewell to the back waters in kerela to move towards kovalam.

10th December 08 4.30 PM, Kovalam

Kovalam is a internationally renowned beach(one of the top 10 beaches of World) and it has been favorite haunt of tourists since 1930's. A beach paradise with boundless blue of the Arabian Sea and is a sheltered natural bay and truly it was one. We were already very hungry when we reached our hotel and we moved out to check for a hotel. Sher-e-Punjab restaurant was what we wanted the most. North Indian food, after 5 days was a bliss and we ate more than our appetite along with a good chit chat with owner Ashok using proper Hindi. We came back to the hotel and moved towards the private beach in front of Palm shore where some foreigners were enjoying the sea. We joined them, clicked a lot of snaps and attempt to build a house in the name of Kerela development authority. Fun never ends when you are enjoying and so we continued to play around and there came the clouds again :-(. It didn’t rain fortunately but a clear sunset view was what we longed for. By the time sun was about to set, the clouds cleared a bit and we could see some good view of the setting sun. Dinner at Sher-e-Punjab followed by a stroll at the actual kovalam beach was a perfect way to end a hectic day.

11th December 08, 6.00 AM

Yet again we got up earlier than Mr. Sun and walked towards the beach to click some good snaps and enjoy the early morning stroll on sand. It was as beautiful as the evening and the light house became the best backdrop for our snaps.

At around 9.30 we started towards Kanyakumari, you must appreciate our appetite to see more and more. It was a 3 hour journey and we reached end of India, a spot of Kanyakumari to board a steamer to visit Vivekananda rock. After that we spent some time at Triveni Sangam (three oceans meet) trying to make out the three colors of the water. We could recognize only two but couldn’t wait till sunset as we had to visit wooden palace at our way back. When we reached the palace it was closed and we could just take a few picture at the gates. Am not elaborating much as these were only two places we could visit and it was very hot there. But the experience to touch the last end of India was too encouraging for us to still enjoy the place and the heat.

Next day, 12th December we clicked some snaps around the sea shore and boarded our flight from Trivandrum airport to travel back to Delhi via Chennai. India was playing against England and there was more security than usual at the airport. We are VIPs you would agree!! We had some snacks before boarding Jet-airways as it was no frills, but they served us food on a 1.5 hour flight which we never anticipated so we enjoyed the homely treatment. But Spice Jet(Chennai to Delhi) again mistreated us by providing us water only when we ordered something from their menu. These no frill flights are not worth a travel but price does matter!!!

After 16 days, 29th December 08

Having joined office and covering up a hectic schedule, I didn’t get any time to write this blog. But today, My boss commented on my Kerela snaps, “How can someone come back from such a place and work” and I could do nothing but smile. So, I decided I would walk down the memory lane and visit my beautiful holidays again.

Thanks a lot for reading through such a long blog, but am sure I have convinced you enough to attempt this visit to Kerela which I call - A Nature’s paradise. But do remember the best time to visit Kerela is in the winter months of Nov to Jan and the season starts on 15th December after which the hotel and travel rates would be high, so best before date according to me is 14th Dec. Also, Please remember to take the following along:

One Pullover for Munnar, Pudin hara for your stomach, mosquito repellent and some good CDs and DVDs for the houseboat and sunscreen lotion for Kovalam and an umbrella as it can rain without season.

Wish you a happy journey and a wonderful life!!!

Marriage…a quest of Destiny!!!

2008-03-03T01:51:00.000-08:00

When I cross by a wedding car, am often tempted to peep in to look at the couple and imagine how they would have met. Who would have initiated the first contact and what was the source to bring them together.

Recent trend of wedding planner sites which people set up before their marriages, makes it more interesting to read, how they met, what they feel about each other and what is the thing which clicked.

Gleaming faces of the couple on Wedding stage and smiles all around gives an enticing thought of what brought them together and were they meant to be. They would not have known each other all their lives but they are standing here, glued together and introducing themselves to their extended families.

Thoughts of a great life with butterflies in stomach around honeymoon bring the never ending smile and radiance on the face, which is not possible with many balanced diets and gold facials. Life would be changed for ever, from individualism to collectivism, from my dreams to our dreams and from my life to our life.

It all begins with search, which is on for one of my friends, she often goes through such sessions of discussion, which she mocking calls "Marriage Interrogation" with people having invisible paper in hand full of questions around your daily routines, your thoughts etc. She answers all but is still not able to make up her mind, she asks me, how you know that he is right for you, on what basis should I make a choice.

A strong perception, which I have is that the face of the person matches yours as have seen many couples like that, but world if full of some odd combinations too. Some use horoscopes, some use numerology, some read Linda, but what calculations we apply to check destiny!!!

With my close friend all set for her marriage soon, I got a chance to listen to her sessions. Her parents have been looking for a match for years, meeting people, acceptance, rejection and finally got a proposal. It was again initiated by her parents, she has seen his profile and knew the essentials. Initially she got just 5 minutes, but the guy seemed decided and he said, “Only thing I wish is that I should not repent after marriage”, Is that all, we were all amazed?

We discussed it with her and suggested that you should meet him once again. She went ahead, spent a few hours of talk, fun, discussing their likes and dislikes and don’t know what jelled but they were happy to be together. How did they arrive at compatibility, just liked talking to each other or were they destined to be?

Wishing her luck, but have seen cases, where the courtship went on for months both fell in love, life was set, even kids names were decided, but the marriage was called off just one day prior to M day, because of dowry. She was stern and said no, but she cried as she really loved that guy. Just within a month, she met another guy, they liked each other and got married. It is strange, but this seems again to be play of destiny.

Being in IT, I really wish I could develop software to put in the essential data and baam!! it produces a chart with probability ratings and help give precise information on the prediction around destiny, ratings like excellent, very good or satisfactory or no-no can help make our mind. Appears to be great but need to understand the rules which god applies and assumptions around the same.

So, what is it which brings people together, how it happens, why it happens, when it happens and what leads them to marriage keeps this wonderwrite…wonder...when it comes to decision what is it that applies…

Why women underplay intelligence?

2008-02-29T01:12:00.000-08:00

Recently read an article in Newspaper "I just can’t handle you". It was related to why men cant handle women today and does that mean they are not able to take their rising strength. But it also highlighted that women tend to underplay intelligence and "showing her weakness is where a woman’s greatest strength lies".

For all those men who are reading this blog, this is not a comparison with Men but a thought for all of us, so your opinions are well appreciated.

Women Intelligence should be unquestioned as we have seen our mothers, who don’t have any master’s degrees but they are our doctors, psychiatrist, teachers and above all best friends. They have given us the intelligence we have today and made us what we are. Further, they have incredible knowledge in handling budgets, articulation of thoughts, improvising moods based on the situation at home and many such arts which are difficult to elaborate in words.

This article also referenced that pass percentage of girls in CBSE exams is always higher than boys and over the years they would out number men in the professional domain.

So, the question is why women underplay intelligence?

Most talked about Movie, chak de!! which was all about women power had shown the problems which women have to face if they want to carve a niche for themselves. It showcased when they were to play against a men's team, they were not sure if they should play the match or not. Though they won the match finally but what was the reason for initial inhibition.

Some opinions from men:

"We know this was what used to be there in the past, people were brought up in that way and the trend continued for long but is slowly but surely fading at least in big cities and among educated people, though it takes time to let go old trends. Men have their ego and women can adjust better and women are expected to compromise more than men because they are more capable of doing so"

"Women are neither dumb nor underplay intelligence but vacillate quite a bit or so has been my experience"

Though there would be other thoughts but appears that men appreciate the role of women and are aware of their intelligence, then what is that which makes them hesitant?

Some facts, as seen in India are if they act intelligent & compete they are thought to be aggressive and if they underplay they are well accepted, so they prefer to keep quite than exhibit their thoughts.

Similar experiences have been faced by women in the professional world. If a woman is performing well in a role, people start linking her to bad character while she was actually at her intelligent best. So, women get confused that what level of intelligence should be exhibited so that they are well accepted.

So, is acceptance the only reason or many more...please comment.

Walk of Life..

2008-02-04T01:08:00.000-08:00

When you step out in the world and start walking ...a new journey has begun. From childhood till adolescence, the fortunate of us, have a hand to hold and guide us to the right direction. We tumble and they pick us up and bring us to level where we learn to walk straight and choose a path. Slowly the firm grip of the hand loosens and we are free to tread our paths. This is when the walk of life actually begins.

We meet people and who come up as acquaintances and some of them become friends. We laugh with them, in the moments of their happiness, share jokes and daily experiences and feel that they bring out the best in us. In the process we build up relations which are named as friends, boy friends, girl friends, colleagues and at times eye candies whom we would love to talk and know them, but the shyness or some other reasons stop us from approaching them. But these faces, these names and these relations become your reason to live and be happy. Then there are times when we fight with them on petty issues and sometimes these fights make us leave them abruptly.

With each person we meet we get to know a unique drop in the ocean which looks similar to us but has a entirely different soul. Some people you remember as your good friends who had been with you in all times, but some you would love to hate, forget and even curse meeting them for once.

Question is why do these people ever come to our life, what was their role and did they perform their role to give us a positive or a negative thought. It is related to the people who we knew as friends, those whom we loved and couldn't imagine our life without them. But as we move on we meet new people, start sharing similar feelings for them and walk of life continues….

Other than people life gives us experiences such as scoring the highest grade, getting your first job, your first salary, your first visit abroad which at times makes us ride high on the clouds or take us on top of the world. We are thrilled by the thoughts of achievement and become confident that no one can hurt or dismantle the lucky state. But then there are downfalls, again another experience which makes you depressed. At times the pain becomes so hard that we feel like killing ourselves. At that hour we never think of the positive side of what we have gained and everything seems lost.

Question asked at that moment is why this happened to me and what would I do beyond this. We seem to loose a direction in life and trust in ourselves. But a hand, whether it is of a soul known/unknown to you or your inner strength pulls you through and walk of life continues…..

On the way, when we walk our thoughts and personalities change. It changes unimaginably for some or minutely for others, but with each experience of life, we learn a new strength or weakness within us. I have myself changed over the years from a introvert to an extrovert and am thankful to my situations and my friends who have moved out that vulnerability and made me a confident person what I am today, but still it is not the end. Similar could be instances with each one of us and when we look back we can see what we are and what we were.

Question again arises, this is what we are supposed to be or it’s again not meant to be.

Answers to these and many such questions are as unknown as our future but the walk of life continues.....